Hello, my name is Jonny and I will be your guide throughout this tour. This tour of the struggle bus that is my life. Yeah. My life went from a mess to a bigger pile of a mess. I started off this year with one heck of a start and by that I mean I am homeless. I have been sleeping on couches and living out of my car for the last week. So I’m gonna call this my Couch Hopping series. If you say that fast enough, it sounds like Cow chopping and then it gets awkward because you’ll be like “Jonny, why are you chopping cows? what did they ever do to you except be delicious and allow you to not eat cereal bland? Also why are you documenting these things? Did I click on a weird fetish site and didn’t know about it?” Then I answer with “Shhhh, you ask too many questions. Just accept it, take it. Take it like a man.” Then one of you’ll be offended because it’s not politically correct or something and blah blah blah. Anyways, this is getting off track, reasons why I shouldn’t blog because it’s just me rambling about random crap that doesn’t really matter but you’re still reading so I must be doing something right, like putting a gun to your head and forcing you to read this. Wait, what? Who are you? I’m sorry. I’m delusional. I should probably not post such things. Oh well, the internet makes me do weird things, like sign up for Jewish dating websites, I’m not Jewish but I love Jews. Is that bad? Probably. Oh well. I love and hate everyone equally. So it’s okay. I’ll sign up for a Gluten Free dating site next because I’m adventurous, these things exist, google it. It’s what the internet is for. Who needs to go outside and interact with human beings when you can just sit here and read random blogs and sign up for weird dating sites? What was I talking about again?